Lemme Show Ya Where Else You Can Floss, Doc

I don't know what it is with me and dentists.

Last year, DH went to a dentist for the first time in...awhile. She found all kinds of problems with his teeth. Recommended pulling most of his fillings and replacing them, among other things. Had a thousand reasons why this was a good idea. So he agreed and started in, letting her pull out his old silver and replace it with a white composite.

All was well until the bill came. Seems our insurance company didn't see the sense in this and deemed it "cosmetic," and, therefore, optional. Not covered.

Huh. We wrote the check and, just for kicks and giggles, had DH visit another dentist, who came recommended by two neighbors. Surprise of surprises, Dentist #2 didn't see any reason to pull those old fillings. Even did his own series of X-rays to be sure. Nope, work not needed.

It's the oldest scam in the dental book--convince people their old fillings are defective and replace them, for big bucks. I mean, with flouride and all, what else are you gonna do to keep the old income train chugging along?

Lesson learned.

Fast forward: three weeks ago, DS went to the pediatric dentist to have fillings put in four of his teeth (I swear to God and all the saints that I brush his teeth religiously.) and sealants put on the other back teeth, to avoid the whole cavity thing in the future. The sealants, the dentist said, wouldn't be covered by insurance.

Fine, said I. Do what the boy needs.

An hour and $506 later, he had hole-free, sealed-up choppers. All was right with the world.

Until yesterday. When I thought about this some and got all riled up. I mean, what, exactly, am I paying for with the insurance company if they're not going to cover basic treatment?

So I called them. And get this: most of the $506 wasn't for sealants, but for those blasted cosmetic fillings again! Because the cavities were in his very backest teeth and because those teeth are baby teeth, the insurance gods thought silver fillings would be fine, thanks, and covered only the cost of those. Something like $400 came out of my pocked for tooth-colored fillings.

I was never given the option of silver fillings for him. In fact, the type of fillings to be installed was never discussed.

Pissed off am I.

Today, I called the dental office manager. We had a loooooooong chat about necessary treatments vs cosmetic treatments, and baby teeth vs. permanent teeth, and the basic concept of full disclosure and honesty, particularly where my credit card is involved.

"We don't use silver fillings," she said.

"Why's that," I asked.

"Ummm....becauuuuuuuse..."

Because you can attack my damned wallet easier that way, that's why!!

Here's the thing: Going to the dentist is a lot like taking my car to the dealer. I don't know nothin' about no cars. So I need to trust the person doing the work to tell me exactly what's wrong and exactly how we fix it. Without ripping me off, wasting my time, or padding the numbers at all.

I won't bore you with the rest of the conversation, but our previously-scheduled December appointments have been cancelled, and I'm looking for a new pediatric dentist. And from talking to a bunch of people today, I'm learning this isn't that uncommon. Unfortunately, having one's teeth taken care of has become akin to visiting a used car dealership by the side of the highway.

Buyer beware. How sad is that?